Sinéad O’Connor: Queen of Deviant Behavior

Sinéad O’Connor: Queen of Deviant Behavior. Her Four Greatest Conflicts
By Jaime Lees
Fri., Sep. 2. 2011

Sinéad O’Connor has been back in the news lately, but it might not be for what you’d expect. Throughout her entire career, O’Connor has been fighting for one good cause after the last. She’s always outspoken against racism and censorship and she stresses the importance of the rights of children and women. She’s known for being brash, shocking and a little confusing. Here, we celebrate her rebellious streak with the some of top acts of deviant behavior committed by Miss O’Connor. Don’t worry, we’ll get to “the difficult brown.”

4. Sinéad vs. the Roman Catholic Church
Chances are that you know that Sinéad O’Connor was “the bald one.” If you remember anything else about her, it’s probably that she’s the bald one who ripped up a picture of Pope John Paul II on Saturday Night Live. In 1992, O’Connor was performing on the show as the musical guest, doing a cover of Bob Marley’s “War.” Instead of performing the song in the same hiccupy Jamaican style as the original, O’Connor’s version was a cappella, more like a solo spoken word poetry reading of the lyrics. At the end of the song (while singing the world “evil”) she held up a picture of JP2, ripped it up and said “fight the real enemy.” Yeah, that didn’t go over well. She later said that she intended the performance as a protest against the Catholic Church because she felt like the Vatican was responsible for covering up child sex scandals. Meanwhile, O’Connor claimed that she would want to be a priest if she wasn’t a singer, and was ordained in an independent church in 1999.

3. Sinéad vs. her audience
Sinéad was crucified in the media after her SNL performance. People were pissed. Sinéad also could not successfully explain her actions. This was a time before instant internet tabloids or Twitter feeds and the news moved much slower. And what were people to do, read her mind? All most of America heard was that she ripped up a picture of the Pope, which meant that, clearly, she was a horrible bitch. So, two short weeks later, she was scheduled to sing at a Bob Dylan tribute concert. As she took the stage, she was met with boos from the crowd. Lots of boos. Like, thousands of people booing her for more than two minutes, which is a hell of a long time to just calmly stand there on stage and take it. Still, she stood, with her hands clasped behind her and let them get it all out. Finally, there was a twinkle in her eye. She hushed her bandmates who were trying to start the song, asked for her microphone to be turned up, and jumped into an angry repeat performance of “War,” the same song she’d sang on SNL. Oh, snap! Sinéad has some serious balls, man.

2. Sinéad vs. Prince
O’Connor’s biggest hit was 1990′s “Nothing Compares 2 U.” If the spelling doesn’t already give it away, this song was written and performed by Prince. O’Connor’s version became an international hit, spending weeks atop the charts of multiple countries. Despite handing out his songs to many pop stars, Prince was reportedly resentful of Sinéad’s success with his song. (There have been rumors that he acted the same way with Cyndi Lauper after she bested his version of “When You Were Mine.”) It is not wise to mess with The Purple One; and Sinéad reported that the two came to blows over it. Sounds totally scary.

In another odd bit of Sinéad vs. Prince news, doesn’t the drawing shown at the very end of Prince’s 1984 video for “When Doves Cry” look just like Sinéad in the 1990 “Nothing Compares 2 U” video? Is Prince a psychic? Was Sinéad ripping him off? Does anybody else think this is weird?

1. Sinéad vs. her libido
Holy crap, Sinéad O’Connor is one dirty lady. Damn. She is really horny for some man weiner (well, she is a priest). She’s taken to updating her official web site with the things she is looking for in a lover. She is announcing that she is “desperate for sex” and that she’s not turning to a match-making service because she feels that word would get out anyway. She even threatens to hump on produce if she is not serviced soon.

My shit-uation sexually/affectionately speaking is so dire that inanimate objects are starting to look good as are inappropriate and/or unavailable men and/or inappropriate and/or unavailable fruits and vegetables. I tell you yams are looking like the winners.

Some examples of what Sinéad’s is looking for:

  • He must be no younger than 44.
  • Must be living in Ireland but I don’t care if he is from the planet Zog.
  • Must be blind enough to think I’m gorgeous.
  • Leather trouser- wearing gardai, fire-men, rugby players, and Robert Downey-Junior will be given special consideration. As will literally anyone who applies.
  • I like me a hairy man so buffed and/or waxed need not apply.
  • No hair gel.
  • No hair dryer use.
  • No hair dye
  • Stubble is a non-negotiable must. Any removal of stubble would be upsetting for me.
  • No after shave.
  • Must be very ‘snuggly’. Not just wham-bam.
  • Must be wham-bam.
  • Has to live in own place.

She concluded this list with, “I must end now as I have a hot date with a banana.” Shit, girl! Calm yourself! Since this first post, she’s updated her website to say that she would also have sex with women and that she will not consider any man who is not into anal sex. Sinéad wrote, “I’ve been repeatedly asked will I ‘do anal sex’. Let me make it very clear.. Any man I contemplate has to be into anal sex… I ‘do anal’ and in fact would be deeply unhappy if ‘doing anal’ wasn’t on the menu… So if u don’t like ‘the difficult brown’.. Don’t apply.”

The Difficult Brown?!? DAYUMN! That is deviant as hell! Sinéad, we salute you. We never know what deviant thing you’ll do next. Maybe you’ll do a show where you have anal sex with Prince and the Pope? Fingers crossed.

  • Riverfront Times – link