100 St. Louis Bands, 100 Drink Pairings: A Comprehensive Guide

100 St. Louis Bands, 100 Drink Pairings: A Comprehensive Guide
By Jaime Lees
Fri., Nov. 11 2011

​Oh, the interwebz. You give us so many awesome gifts. You even take things that are already awesome, and then you put a kitten on them and make them even awesomer. For that we thank you.

Today we celebrate Drinkify.org. This site is hot stuff this week — it’s being posted all over social media web sites and linked in emails. Drinkify is an online drinking guide that pairs the music you are listening to with a suggested cocktail. It’s kind of like having your own personal smart, crunk sommelier.

The design is simple: you type in a band name, click a button that reads “What Should I Drink” and then Drinkify sends you back a photo of the band and and ingredient list with instructions. Drinkify’s output is based on a combination of search results, including band biographies, images and top tracks. The drink suggestions are usually cocktails, and many of them are eerily-similar to the fancy-folk drinks that are served up at the Royale.

Because there is so much information available online, the results are sometimes scary-accurate. For example, if a band puts its favorite beer in its bio, that is probably the beer that Drinkify will suggest.

To test out the site and get a representative sample of the responses supplied by Drinkify, I searched for every band and performer who was nominated for our RFT Music Awards this year plus some classic St. Louis performers and a few personal favorites.

The results ranged from W.T.F. (Pokey LaFarge) to SHOCKINGLY ACCURATE (Sex Robots) to YEAH, PROBABLY (Funky Butt Brass Band) to THAT’S RAW (Murphy Lee).

Of course, there were some glitches; it’s not a perfect system. But there were some cool surprises, too. Here’s a few findings of my research:

  • Drinkify didn’t offer a suggested cocktail for every band I tried or it returned the wrong result. Which is a shame, really, because I’d like to buy Magic City a drink. (Ed. seconded.)
  • Sometimes Drinkify gave cocktail result but with no band picture included to certify that this drink was, indeed, for this band. I decided that these results probably couldn’t be relied upon, until I searched for .e. Drinkify says that when listening to .e, the suggested cocktail is 12 oz. of marijuana, served on the rocks. Yeah, that sounds about right.
  • Drinkify is totally postmodern. It is aware of itself and of other memes. For instance, a search for the Jumpstarts resulted with a suggestion of “4 oz. of White whine.”

Check out our comprehensive list below. Which drink would you most like to try? If you’re an artist, will you be sampling your own drink? And who had a cool result that wasn’t included on this list?

“THE BETH BOMBARA”
6 oz. Home brew
Serve neat. Stir quickly. Garnish with sprig of mint.

“THE BIG GEORGE BROCK”
8 oz. Vodka
Serve neat. Stir vigorously.

“THE BLACK SPADE”
6 oz. Rum
Serve on rocks. Stir slowly.

“THE BLIND EYES”
12 oz. Horilka
12 oz. Coke
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE BOREAN DUSK”
8 oz. Woodford Reserve Bourbon
Serve neat. Stir quickly. Garnish with twist of lemon.

“THE BOTTLE ROCKETS”
8 oz. Moonshine
8 oz. V812 oz. Grapefruit juice
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir vigorously. Garnish with maraschino cherry.

“THE BREAKS”
8 oz. Coke
8 oz. Tequila Añejo
8 oz. Coffee
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE BUNNYGRUNT”
12 oz. Vodka
Serve neat. Garnish with twist of grapefruit.

“THE BRADD YOUNG”
6 oz. Ogogoro
Serve on rocks.

“THE BROTHERS LAZAROFF”
4 oz. Fernet
Serve neat. Stir vigorously. Garnish with wedge of pineapple.

“THE BRYANT STEWART”
1 bottle Chilli pepper Vodka
1 bottle Iced tea
4 oz. Jägermeister
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve. Garnish with salt.

“THE CASSIE MORGAN”
4 oz. Microbrew
Serve neat. Stir slowly. Garnish with cocktail onions.

“THE CHUCK BERRY”
8 oz. Maker’s Mark Bourbon
8 oz. Pineapple juice
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir vigorously.

“THE CONFORMISTS”
1 Anchor Steam
Serve cold. Garnish with fresh berries.

“THE CROSS EXAMINATION”
1 Brooklyn Lager
Serve cold.

“THE DAVE BLACK”
1 bottle Merlot
Serve at room temperature.

“THE DENISE THIMES”
1 oz. Hendricks Gin
1 oz. Nordic Mist
1 oz. Nordic Mist
Combine in highball glass and serve. Garnish with wedge of watermelon.

“THE DISAPPEARED”
2 oz. Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey
Serve neat.

“THE DOOM TOWN”
12 oz. Pisco
Serve on rocks. Garnish with national flag.

“THE DUBB NUBB”
2 oz. Havana Club Dark Rum
Serve neat.

“THE EARTHWORMS”
6 oz. Rum
Serve neat. Stir slowly.

“THE FISTER”
4 oz. Canadian Club Whiskey
4 oz. Coco López
8 oz. Fernet
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve.

“THE FONTELLA BASS”
10 oz. Gin
Serve neat. Garnish with fire.

“THE FRANKENHOOKERS”
1 oz. Cachaça
1 oz. Lemon sour
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE FRESH HEIR”
1 oz. Blackwoods Gin
Serve on rocks. Stir slowly. Garnish with twist of grapefruit.

“THE FUNKY BUTT BRASS BAND”
4 oz. Absinthe
Serve on rocks. Garnish with straw.

“THE GRAVITY KILLS”
10 oz. Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey
10 oz. Nordic Mist
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve. Stir quickly.

“THE GREEK FIRE”
1 Bud Light
Serve cold.

“THE HAMIET BLUIETT”
1 bottle Red Wine
Serve on rocks. Stir vigorously. Garnish with maraschino cherry.

“THE HUMANOIDS”
1 PBR
Serve cold.

“THE HUMDRUM”
1 oz. Bottled water
Serve neat. Stir quickly.

“THE IKE TURNER”
2 oz. Vodka
Serve neat. Stir vigorously.

“THE ILLPHONICS”
1 Red Stripe
Serve cold.

“THE INCURABLES”
6 oz. Kaoliang
Serve on rocks. Stir slowly.

“THE JAVIER MENDOZA”
8 oz. Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey
Serve neat. Stir vigorously.

“THE JAY FARRAR”
1 oz. Canadian Club Whiskey
1 oz. Grenadine
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE JOE STICKLEY”
1 oz. Macallan Scotch
1 oz. Sweetened lime juice
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve.

“THE JON HARDY”
6 oz. Rum
Serve on rocks. Stir quickly.

“THE JUMBLING TOWERS”
1 Brooklyn Lager
Serve cold.

“THE KENTUCKY KNIFE FIGHT”
8 oz. Maotai
Serve on rocks. Stir vigorously. Garnish with twist of lemon.

“THE LEFT ARM”
1 Rolling Rock
Serve cold.

“THE LION’S DAUGHTER”
8 oz. Mezcal
Serve neat.

“THE LUCABRASI”
1 Sierra Nevada Pale Ale
Serve cold.

“THE LUDO”
8 oz. Laphroaig Scotch
8 oz. Grenadine
1 oz. Rose’s lime juice
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir quickly. Garnish with glowstick.

“THE MAGNOLIA SUMMER”
8 oz. Talisker Scotch
8 oz. Red Bull
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE MARQUISE KNOX”
1 oz. Arrack
Serve on rocks. Garnish with celery stalk.

“THE MONADS”
8 oz. Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey
Serve on rocks. Stir vigorously.

“THE MURPHY LEE”
12 oz. Cough syrup
12 oz. Moonshine
Serve on rocks. Garnish with cocktail onions.

“THE NATO CALIPH”
12 oz. Rum
12 oz. Lemon juice
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve.

“THE DJ NEEDLES”
6 oz. Fucking Rum
Serve on rocks.

“THE NELLY”
10 oz. Gin
Serve on rocks. Stir quickly. Garnish with pickled asparagus.
“THE OLIVER SAIN”
1 bottle Red wine
Serve at room temperature. Garnish with sugar.

“THE PALE DIVINE”
12 oz. Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey
12 oz. Egg whites
2 oz. Tonic water
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir vigorously. Garnish with twist of lemon.

“THE PETER MARTIN”
10 oz. Vodka
10 oz. Grenadine
6 oz. Monster Energy Drink
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir quickly. Garnish with glowstick.

“THE POKEY LAFARGE”
1 oz. Żubrówka Vodka
1 oz. Red Bull
Combine in highball glass and serve

“THE PRETTY LITTLE EMPIRE”
4 oz. Maotai
Serve on rocks. Stir vigorously. Garnish with fire.

“THE PRINCE EA”
6 oz. Glenfiddich Scotch
Serve neat. Stir slowly. Garnish with sugar.

“THE RA CAILUM”
8 oz. Water
Serve neat.

“THE RAGLANI”
1 Berliner Weisse
Serve cold. Garnish with pickled carrot sticks.

“THE REGGIE THOMAS”
4 oz. Arak
Serve on rocks. Garnish with pickled carrot sticks.

“THE ROCKIN JAKE”
1 oz. Marijuana
Serve neat. Garnish with maraschino cherry.

“THE ROCKWELL KNUCKLES”
10 oz. Beefeater Gin
Serve on rocks. Garnish with maraschino cherry.

“THE ROUGH SHOP”
1 bottle Red wine
Serve at room temperature.

“THE RUM DRUM RAMBLERS”
12 oz. Armagnac
12 oz. Coke
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve.

“THE SCRIPTS ‘N SCREWZ”
8 oz. Absolut Vodka
Serve neat. Stir slowly. Garnish with wedge of kiwi.

“THE SEX ROBOTS”
4 oz. Talisker Scotch
Serve neat. Stir vigorously. Garnish with cocktail monkey.

“THE SHAVED WOMEN”
1 oz. Ouzo
Serve neat.

“THE SINE NOMINE”
12 oz. Water
12 oz. Lemon juice
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve.

“THE SLEEPY KITTY”
8 oz. Rum, Fucking Rum
8 oz. Coco López
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE SO MANY DYNAMOS”
1 La Fin du Monde
Serve cold.

“THE SON VOLT”
1 oz. Sipsmith Gin
1 oz. Rose’s lime juice
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir quickly.

“THE ST. LUNATICS”
8 oz. Cough syrup
8 oz. Canadian Club Whiskey
Serve on rocks. Stir slowly. Garnish with sugar.

“THE STORY OF THE YEAR”
10 oz. Whiskey
Serve on rocks.

“THE SYNA SO PRO”
10 oz. Fucking Rum
10 oz. Lemon juice
10 oz. Tequila Reposado
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve.

“THE TEDDY PRESBERG”
1 bottle Red wine
Serve at room temperature. Garnish with olive.

“THE TERESAJENEE”
1 oz. Hennessy
1 oz. Coffee
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE THEODORE”
6 oz. Vodka
Serve neat. Garnish with wedge of kiwi.

“THE TEF POE”
8 oz. Cognac
8 oz. Coco López
Combine in highball glass and serve.

“THE TRIP DADDYS”
4 oz. Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey
Serve on rocks. Garnish with olive.

“THE TROUBADOUR DALI”
1 bottle Organic red wine
Serve at room temperature. Garnish with cucumber.

“THE TIGHT PANTS SYNDROME”
10 oz. Maker’s Mark Bourbon
10 oz. Ice Cream
1 oz. Milk
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir vigorously. Garnish with sugar.

“THE ULTRAMAN”
4 oz. Laphroaig Scotch
Serve neat. Garnish with pickled carrot sticks.

“THE UNCLE TUPELO”
8 oz. Sipsmith Gin
8 oz. Nordic Mist
2 oz. Glenfiddich Scotch
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve. Stir quickly.

“THE UNION TREE REVIEW”
10 oz. Apricot Brandy
Serve on rocks. Garnish with glowstick.

“THE VANDALYZM”
12 oz. Jägermeister
12 oz. 7-up
Combine in shaker and strain into cocktail glass. Serve. Stir vigorously.

“THE 7 SHOT SCREAMERS”
8 oz. Maker’s Mark Bourbon
8 oz. Nordic Mist
Combine in highball glass and serve. Stir vigorously.

NO RESULTS RETURNED:
Bikini Acid
Blind Nils
Britches
Buxom Space Fish
Celia Shacklett
Colonel Ford
Corbeta Corbata
Diesel Island
The Dive Poets
Dots Not Feathers
Dust Bunny
Egg Chef
Ellen the Felon
Eric Hall
Everything Went Black
Flaming Death Trap
Flex Boogie
The Fuck Off and Dies
Ghost Ice
Glass Teeth
Good 4 the Soul
The Haddonfields
Half Gay
Indiana Rome
Karate Bikini
Lamar Harris
Langen Neubacher
Lavelle Spitz
Machree
Masculine Journey
Maximum Effort
Morgan Nusbaum
Née
Nune
Prairie Rehab
Roland Johnson and the Voodoo Blues Band
Rough Grooves
Safety Words
Skarekrau Radio
The Skekses
The Soul Alliance featuring CoCo Soul
Spelling Bee
There’s a Killer Among Us
18andCounting
40 ‘Til 5

NAME WOULDN’T SEARCH:
We’re Wolf

ON THE LIST, BUT WITHOUT A PHOTO:
Black James
Caleb Travers
Catholic Guilt
Dogtown Allstars
.e
Ground Floor Band
Jay Fay
The Jumpstarts
Messy Jiverson
MoTre
The Phonocaptors
Scotty Mac
Theresa Payne
The Vondrukes
Warm Jets USA

ON THE LIST, BUT WAS THE WRONG RESULT:
Aloha
Bo & the Locomotive
Buz
Forensic
Kevin Harris
Magic City
Rats & People Motion Picture Orchestra
Rob Lemon
Sweet Tooth
Tok

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